The Dish Detergent Dilemma

Wow! What a crazy night. So last night, I posted a couple of new posts on here at around midnight. then I went to bed and read my scriptures for a bit and fell asleep. I woke up at about 3:00am to what I thought was the storm of the century! Also, I was very uncomfortable because Cedric had 007-ed his way into the bed and stolen my pillow barricade, causing my severe discomfort. So, I got up and checked the weather on the computer and saw that we were indeed getting a very nasty storm. I started to worry about Tristan and my mom camping on the wagon train with all this crazy lightening going on. So, I couldn't sleep. I said a prayer and had to convince myself not to call my mother's cell phone and let her know what a complete lunatic I was!
so I laid in bed, after some serious adjustments, and thought of all the horrible things that could happen to my mom and Tristan. then, I realized that I was not exercising any faith at all in God and tried to clear my mind. I did yoga breathing for a while and soon was asleep again. So that leads me to my nutty dream and a pet peeve of mine. Here we go:
One of the things that is most awkward and annoying to me is the simple act of someone asking to help or me not knowing whether or not to help at dinner parties. What am I talking about, you say??? Let me try to explain.
When I invite people over to my house for a party, dinner, cookout, whatever; I expect that I will be hosting people at my home and that they are not my servants...they are my guests. right? When I am invited to other people's homes I don't go expecting to cook or clean...if I wanted to do that I would just stay at home. But, there is always that weird moment at the end of a meal where you ask if you can help clean up, to be a polite person, and of course the host will usually decline because they don't want to put you to work. Or rather, you would end up wandering around their kitchen, asking them forty million questions about where their forks go, or where their towels are. Ridiculous.
so in my dream, I was invited to the White House for a presidential dinner with President Bush! Wow! Right?!?!? I was about to jump out of my skin in my dream and had a wonderful meal, conversation, overall good time with the Pres. But, at the end of the meal, I remember thinking in my head, do I ask to help clean up. Certainly not at the White House!!! What kind of idiot would ask to clean up at the white house!?!?! So, that is how awoke...faced with this moral dilemma, that I like to call the Dish Detergent Dilemma.
I do appreciate the thought of someone asking to help me clean up a meal that I have cooked for them, but it is just not necessary. Then, I feel like I am barking orders the whole time telling them where everything is or how to correctly load my dishwasher! ( Cuz, we all know we do it differently:)

I don't know, I'm pretty sure that I have way over-thought this matter on way to many occasions. these are the things that occupy my mind about 50% of the time. weird stuff. I also wonder about how to end phone calls without hanging up on people. I can say what I want in about 1-2 sentences. I hate talking on the phone any longer. JEremy gets mad when I say what I need and then hang up. He thinks it's rude. I think I am saving cell phone nimutes!