Valentine's Dance

Cedric wanted to go to the middle school Valentine's dance.  He wanted to dress up even though other kids had told him that they were just gonna wear jeans or whatever.  So, he called Grandma Trapp and made sure to get his suit ahead of time(mostly, lol).  He totally dressed himself.  I LOVE it!  He has a style all his own and knows just how to make things look good!  He went to the dance and had a great time!

Pinewood Derby

 Liam had a pinewood derby for Cub Scouts a few weeks back.  We totally forgot about it and then realized that we hadn't even made him his car yet.  This was during the time that Grandma Boyer was in hospice and it is hard to get one on one time with kiddos when they are all around so....we just decided that he would use his car from last year.  Technically they aren't supposed to do that but, whatever.  Extenuating circumstances.  LOL!  Jeremy came home a few hours early from work on the day of the derby and spent time with Liam and Asher working on last years cars to change them up a bit.  Liam ending up getting FIRST PLACE!  He was so excited and we were so PROUD.  Asher went along and raced with his car just for fun.  Jeremy added some cool stuff to it and they were all thrilled with how it turned out! I didn't get to go to the derby either.  But, hopefully there are more derbys to come.  Good Job, Liam!! LOVE you!

More Sad Things

Well the last month or so has been a doozie.  So much going on, so much to do.  And nothing will slow down, much less stop to let us think and breathe.  This week the man that works for us, Bill, died unexpectedly.  He had cancer and was getting chemo.  He just worked on Saturday for us.  Apparently he had a coughing fit and had an embolism go to his heart and he died quickly.  Jeremy and I both were in shock.  Complete shock. It is just like when my Dad died.  Just BAM!  outta nowhere and you are left with your head spinning and don't know how to act. We are both supposed to go the funeral but, the funeral is today(Saturday) and we don't have a sitter.  I am not taking kids to a funeral again.  Nope. I am going to have to send my condolences through the air or something.  So not only is Bill dying very, very sad but, it does leave us in a tight spot.  Bill actually worked for us quite a bit.  He was available whenever Jeremy would call him.  And a good worker.  A while back, Jeremy decided to let Bill open the store on Saturdays for him.  Well, now we have people that know that we are open on Saturdays and rely on that because it is the only day that they can make it in.  Now, Jeremy is going to have to work the Saturdays or figure something else out.  One of the problems with that is that Jeremy and I were planning on taking Saturdays and getting our house fixed up so that it would freaking sell already.  We need to get in and paint, put up a back splash, clean up the yard to up curb appeal, new lights, etc.  We just never have time to go get anything done.   We NEED it gone fast.  Our contract is up here in July and at that point this house could be sold to someone else.  Not good.  At all. And it is making me freak the freak out.  I went over to the Carthage house on Monday with Vivianne and tried to do some things to help move the projects along.  Well, Vivi was having NOTHING to do with it.  She screamed and screamed until I got her out of her car seat and then screamed and/or got into every little thing she could.  It was pointless. 
Also to coincide or maybe because of all the recent craziness(it's not just the Bill thing) I have been going through major anxiety and mood issues.  I don't understand it.  All I know is that I hate it.  I feel so stupid sometimes(all the time, lol).  I just hope that if my kids read this later in life that they understand why their mom is kinda moody and cranky sometimes.  I love these kids with all my heart but, I am so overwhelmed right now.  I wish they knew how hard I try.  One day they will. 

Something that is awesome is that school is soon to be out for the summer!! YAY!! I am seriously contemplating homeschooling a couple of them next year again.  We shall see.  But, I need to work out these house situations first so that we have a home to have homeschool in, lol! 

Do We Look Alike?

Well this is tiny...you may have to click on it to make it bigger.  Yesterday, I posted this on facebook, just sure that we all three looked exactly alike.  The more I stare at it, the more I start to think we look nothing alike, lol!  But, there is one of the only 'baby' pics I have of myself.  I am really hoping to find some more.  Look at those curls....what the heck was going on with my hair?!?!  I think I was about 12 or 18 months in the pic if I can remember what my mom told me loooong ago! 

A Little Post About Vivi

Okay, so both of those pictures are of my niece, Justine. *Ginny's second daughter* The bottom one is Vivianne. I was always told growing up that Justine and Sidney(Ginny's third daughter) looked like I did when I was younger. I also get that Ginny and I look alike supposedly.  Well, I have never seen it more clearly than right here! Justine posted these pics on facebook yesterday and I was blown away by how much the one of the left looks exactly like Vivi and the one on the right looks just like Eden.  Crazy.  Some strong Trapp genes there!  LOL!

My Vivianne is getting so big!!  She does everything with ease and grace.  She is stunningly gorgeous and blows me away every day with her sparkling personality.  She will soon be one and I cannot believe it.  Fastest year ever.
Some things Vivi does that are cute:

• She loves to wave 'hi' and 'bye' with a big wave, her arm flailing wildly!  Sometimes we get a cute little "hi" too! 
• She loves to give kisses and will do so on command when you ask for kisses.  She sucks her lips in rather than out and makes a cute little fishy face and she makes kissy sounds!  
• She says 'mama' and 'dada' all the time.  
• She is like the most technically correct crawler in the history of babies!  Lol, it's just how she does things!   She is gonna be walking soon.  She likes to stand at things and then let go and just stand.  
• She also likes to smack people right in the face when she gets really excited!  She does it to dolls too.  
• We are teaching her baby sign language and it seems to be going well.  So far we are working on milk and water.  She got a baby sign language board book in her easter basket so we are sticking to what is in it for now.
• I love her squishy little body so dang much!  She has the cutest little chunky, tiny hobbit feet ever.  

I am so annoyed, I can't even see straight. 

Hospice

 ****wrote all this on Monday*******
I cannot believe that it will be April soon and I have so many things from the last 6 months to a year to blog about STILL.  I WILL get it all done one of these days.  The last 10 days or so have been different.  Jeremy's Grandma Boyer is in hospice and the family has been spending her last days with her there.  It is a great little hospice place next to the hospital in Burlington.  I tried to take my camera yesterday and get some good pics.  She wasn't doing so well yesterday though and slept most of the time.  I also felt very awkward asking people to move so I could get a better shot.....so I didn't.  I know I can get some very good ones if I am in the right spot at the right time but, that would require camping out up there which I just can't do.  I did get some good ones.  I really want to capture the love and tenderness that we all feel when we are all together.

20 Days and NO Colista?!

OMG, it has been 20 whole days since I blogged!!!  Okay, so there is much to update but, alas, my children, in all the loving ways, have done something to my keyboard again to make it hell on earth to type.  I need Jeremy to take a look at it and see what the heck is going on.  I will tackle some blogging tomorrow hopefully. 

More From Tuesday

Well, Jeremy and Asher made it safely to and from Quincy in this icy weather to his appointment at Blessing Behavioral Center.  Jeremy was messaging me the whole time letting me know what was going on.  The doc(Dr. Cummings) wants to up Asher's adderall prescription and give him a prescription for bed wetting, and one for sleep.  He brought them home and I started to look them up and they seem kinda scary and weird.  Just initial thoughts but, we shall see.

Every week FitBit sends me my weekly stats. It is pretty cool.  I wish I could paste it on here but, it won't let me.  Anyway, I will try to type it all here because it is very motivational.  One day this week I totally forgot to put the fitbit on the whole day after I took it off to shower.  Also, I wish there were others that would "compete" with me.  Right now my only competitor is Jamie Steen! lol!

This weeks Stats:

Total Steps: 53, 057  Daily Average: 7,580 steps Best Day: 11,307 steps

Total Distance walked: 22.19 miles  Daily Average: 3.17 miles Best Day:4.73 miles

Total Floors Climbed: 73  Daily Average: 10  Best Day:18

Total Calories Burned: 16,400  Daily Average: 2,343  Best Day: 2,640

Calories In vs. Out: -10, 790
Weekly total:16,403 calories burned, 363 calories eaten. -5,520 plan deficit
(This is off because I didn't log all my food and water last week)

Weight Change: 2.0 lbs. Lightest: 196.0  Heaviest: 198.0

Average Sleep Duration: 4 hrs. 28 min.

Average Times Awakened: 7

Average Time to Fall Asleep: 10 min.

I also earn badges daily and weekly.  Last week I earned:

• Boat Shoe (5,000 steps)
• Sneaker(10,000 steps)
• Urban(15,000)
• Happy Hill(10 floors climbed)
• Redwood Forest(25 floors climbed)
• Marathon(26 miles, this is a lifetime badge)
• Penguin March(70 miles, also a lifetime badge)

Anyway, so the one they email me has cute little graphics and charts and what not but, this will serve the same purpose.  So, it is good to see that I am making progress even if it doesn't quite feel like it yet to me.  I started at 206.8 (at least that is the last reference I can find that I wrote down, lol, it could be more actually).  So 10 pounds is an okay start I guess.  I really don't notice it yet.
Also, notice the sleep.  My average amount of times waking at night is 7!  One night last week I woke up 18 times.  We never get to sleep properly because of kids but, with my own sleep issues on top of it, good grief!  This can't be good on my brain, lol!
Also, I go up and down stairs all day long.  Lots and lots of stairs. 

 My Vivi is crawling all over the place!  And she "talks" a lot.  She says Mama and Dada all the time.  She also gives kisses. And has started waving (just today)!  I need to do a separate post on her, never mind, lol!

Tuesday Morning Thoughts

Well, I am quickly losing my mind here.  It has been constant sickness of some sort at this house.  Ear infections, pink eye, sinusitis, bronchitis, colds, puking, head aches, etc.  Just done.  Done. Done.  and Done again.  Ugh.  Just when I get someone better and send them back to school, another kid or two come home from school with something else.  I am at my wits end.  Today we woke up and 56 schools had cancelled for freezing rain/snow that we didn't even know about!  Jeremy and Asher are still attempting to make it to his appointment with the doctor in Quincy.  I worry about that.  His appointment has been cancelled or rescheduled four times now though. 

I am working this week on getting sets ready for a big photo shoot I have this weekend.  It is three families from school that are all doing family sessions at the same time.  Since they all three work for the school, they are letting me set up my indoor studio equipment in the school and we are also doing outdoor sessions as well.  There are a lot of kids to consider and tons of sets to bring together.  It is a big endeavor but, I am hopeful! 

Jeremy and I both went to the walk-in clinic in Carthage bright and early on Saturday morning to get some medicine. We had been sick too long and had to cancel too many things to continue on and hope the sickness would go away.  We got the prescriptions and had to stop by the Carthage house to pick up a bill the Amish guys left us.  I got to see the counter top that they picked out for us.  I was worried about what they picked....but, I shouldn't have wasted the energy on worrying because it is great!  They did a super job! 

Valentines Surprise

It was Friday the 13th.  The kids were off of school and I was having a pretty crappy day.  Suddenly the doorbell rang! Gah!  Who the heck could be here!?!?  I was in lounge clothes and the kids were still running around in pajamas.  Eden ran for the door and then all the others followed so I HAD to get the door.  I opened it and it was a delivery guy with flowers!!  He had two bouquets in his hands(which I was trying to wrap my head around....why were there two?) and I took them and said thank you and he said he had another in the car! What?!  Then I realized that the smaller two were for the girls.  Jeremy had flowers delivered for all three of his girls on Valentine's Day.  It was so cute and the flowers were so pretty.  Eden was excited and I tried to show her how to smell the flowers but, I don't think she wanted to do that again, lol!  A few times a day she walks up to her flowers and says" My Eden flowers."  She liked her strawberry cream filled chocolate heart too!  He had picked out a dozen roses for me and a pink rose for Eden and a purple rose for Vivianne.  He really is thoughtful and cute!  I was happy. 

That Tree In the Corner

Just so everyone knows.....my Christmas tree is finally down.  Yeah, as of two days ago...I finally shoved that thing in it's box and was done with it.  Only to discover there is nowhere good to store it.  Whatever.  I don't care where it goes really.  I have never in my life left my tree up until February 18th!!! What the heck is wrong with me?  Anyway, I did it, and now we can all move on with our lives. 

I Need A Vacation

Pretty sure I have gained everything back that I have lost so far especially after this past weekend.  I haven't weighed myself but, I don't want to.  I am so annoyed with myself.  I will weigh myself at the end of this week and face the facts then.  Right now, I will TRY to refocus.  Sooo, yesterday I finally made it to the Carthage house (I locked all of us out of the Nauvoo house after school....AGAIN....smh) and got to see what is going on there.  Nothing, right now.  They haven't been back since the snow-mageddon incident.  But, I got to see the new laundry closet and it isn't as weird as I imagined.  It is however very tiny and I wonder if the washing machine and dryer will even fit in it.  Omg, it better. 

I really want to get the other house done so we can do work on this house.  We have a couple of rooms and a deck we would like to add. I think that is it.  I really think buying another house as a vacation house would really benefit us better than a much bigger house would. 

Also, I plan on planting cool things around the yard this Spring that will make great photo sets to do photography sessions with too.  I'm looking forward to that. 

Asher is home sick from school today.  He was home yesterday too and puking all night long.  Eden just got sent home from school because it looks like she has pink eye.  Vivianne is congested and goopy.  If it is pink eye that they are all getting, then super.  I love the contagiousness of it all.  Looks like I am spending today sanitizing and cleaning the whole dang house and washing all the bedding.  Joy.  Today is Jeremy's Hannibal day which we all know, makes me crazy.  I don't know what it is, I think at this point my body is trained to freak out when I hear the word Hannibal day.  Anyway, I think Jeremy is getting sick again too. 

This winter is wreaking havoc on my psyche.  I can't even figure out why.  

School Crafties

 This is such a small sample of all the adorable things that the kids bring home that they have made at school.  There is no way I could ever possibly keep every single thing that every single one of them make or do so, I want to start taking pictures of the cute things they make so I remember if they get lost, thrown out, ruined, or whatever.  

Eden  made this penguin.  She  liked to carry it around. 

 I wish I had gotten pics of the snowglobe she had made when she first brought it home.  It was part of the Christmas gift to Jeremy and I that she gave us.  They had decorated a cute little gift bag and had the snowglobe and a couple of other things in it!  It was super cute.  (Each of the kids teachers are always super about sending home gifts from the kids....like at Mother's Day or Christmas or whatever.  It's thoughtful for sure!) The snowglobe got slightly discolored since she brought it home but, other than that has held up well. 

 Cullen's class made these and used them as props in the Christmas program (which I haven't blogged about yet).  

 Cullen made this as well.  I still have one very similar to this one that Tristan made when he was small and we try to hang it on the tree each year. 

 Asher made this a couple of years ago and has enjoyed hanging it somewhere each Christmas since. 

 Eden made this tree and seriously carried it around with her for a couple days straight! 

 Cullen made this cute tree! 

 And this stocking. 

Cullen actually came home with a huge tree he had made that was taller than him!  Laminated and all decorated with him in a star at the top!  

I didn't get a pic before all the stuff started falling off of it but, it was cool! 

 Cullen made this too...(his class made SO MUCH stuff!)  I love it so much that I think I will frame it and put it up each Christmas.  

 Liam made this for Jeremy and gave it to him when he came to school on Donuts with Dad day.  It is really cool too and should last a long time.  It is made out of a block of wood.  On the leaf Liam wrote:  He fixes are computers when there broke.  He helps me to.  

 Another thing Eden made and carried around with her like her new pet.  She lost one of it's eyes but, oh well! 

 Cullen brought this guy home too.  Love it!  This one is sturdy and should last a long time too.  And it is darling! 

 The crayon ornament and the cinnamon heart ornament were the other two gifts from Eden to Jeremy and I at Christmas.  

 Liam made this snowman handprint ornament at Cub Scouts.  Pretty sweet. 

 Asher made this at school as his gift to us.  This is the front. 

This is the back.  It is ceramic and he did a great job on it!  

I really do treasure all the sweet, creative things that our kids get to do and are able to do! 

Happy Valentine's Day

 I spent an afternoon trying to play with Vivi and get pictures at the same time but, she really was making it difficult, lol!  She had such a yucky nose and kept spitting up all over. I did manage to get a couple of cute ones though!  I love her! 

What The Freak

I am seriously upset right now and it is taking everything in me not to go the freak off on people on facebook.  Numerous times over the last few years members of my "Christian" family have deleted me because of things that I believe and/or say.  Yep, you read that right.  Apparently, Jesus loves them more than me because I said that maybe the Noah's Ark story happened differently (and other religious topics).  How very Christian of them to knock a FAMILY MEMBER out of their life because they believe differently than them.  I can tell you that I never sunk that low.  I love my family despite their religious beliefs.  I love them even though I do not believe the same things as them.  I love them unconditionally.....like someone else these people claim to follow.....JESUS CHRIST.  I do not get the same unconditional love in return.  I do as much as I possibly can for family.  I give of things freely, I give of my services freely, I make it to every stinking family thing there is (when their sorry, unorganized butts actually get anything planned), I bend over backwards for people who think I am a piece of crap.  Good luck on your "mission" to save people....cause if you're that judgemental of family, I don't know how you would get anyone to get baptized.  I'm done.  I'm over it.  Either they like me for who I am or they don't.  Whatever. 

FitBit

Well I am down another two pounds in the last two days.  Awesome.  I guess being to anxious to eat has it's benefits.  That and my fitbit has really been helping me notice how I treat my body and what I put into it.  It tracks my water intake, food/calorie intake, my sleep cycles, how many flights of stairs I climb, how many steps I take, my recent exercise, my active minutes, how many miles I walk, and more!  I love, love, love, it! 

Valentine Box

 Liam brought home a note saying that his class was having a valentine box contest!  So excited because usually kids don't make boxes anymore (at Carthage at least where everything sucks).  He said he wanted a robot.  He and I sat down at the table and made most all of the robot together.  Then Jeremy came in and said:"Oh, I bet I have some old parts we could put on it".  Next thing I know those two have the coolest looking robot ever! It even had a plasma ball on top that actually worked!! Freaking awesome.  Unfortunately, he didn't win the contest (I have no idea how but, whatever, it was just for fun).  He loved it and we had a great time making it with him! 

Then when I was at the kindergarten room yesterday, Amy told me that third grade was supposed to make boxes too! I felt SO STINKING BAD.  I need a badge on it that says: BAD MOMMY.  Asher had come home earlier in the week and gave me a class list for valentines and said he needed a valentine box.  I asked if he was sure about that because I hadn't seen any note from his teacher.  He went back to school and came  home again and said that his teacher said he could make one if he wanted to.  So, I assumed that she was just saying he could if he wanted because I still had not seen any note.  Well, Amy said it was handwritten at the bottom of one of her daughter's notes.  What the hell!?!?!?!?  Seriously!??!  When Asher got in the car after school he had clearly had a great time at his valentines party because he talked non-stop before all the other kids could say anything and had to show me everything he got.  I didn't bring it up to him.  But, how bad does it look that we went all out for Liam's box, made homemade valentines for Eden and Cullen, and literally sent Asher with only store bought Fun Dip valentines  (that he specifically requested)?!?!?!?!  I feel so bad.  It was on my mind all day long. I'm sure Asher doesn't really care but, I feel like he always gets the short end of the stick no matter what.  Ugh.  So sorry, Asher.  I  love you.