Are You Freaking Kidding Me?!!?

Holy crap.  I got Tristan's schedule in the mail yesterday.  He is signed up for drivers ed the first semester.  I. can't. deal.  For reals.  I can't even.  I don't understand these parents that keep smiling and joking about it like it isn't the freaking weirdest, scariest, most awful thing they have ever heard.  I am petrified.  I have let Tristan drive the Expedition once on the flats. It was fun and lighthearted and he was shocked that I let him do it.  Cedric was in the car with us and wanted to drive too.  What am I going to do when all the boys are teenagers and all of them driving.  BOYS and DRIVING do NOT go together.  At all.  Boys are so dumb with cars at that age.  I have been in too many cars where I totally should have died....all with stupid freaking boys driving who think it is cool to go way too fast and not obey traffic signs or anything.  And then I hear how much I am going to love him driving because then he can take kids places for me or run errands for me......ppssshhhhhh, whatever.  I don't want to put my younger kids in a car with a brand new driver.  Ummm, no thank you.  I don't want him to go to the store for me because like any man, he won't bring the right thing back anyway. And I sure as heck don't need him taking our cars and wrecking or breaking them in some way.  What a shit creek we would be up then.  And getting a kid a car for their 16th birthday is literally the stupidest, most irresponsible thing I can possibly think of to do for a 16 year old on their birthday.  "Happy Birthday, kid.  Here's a new car. Hope you don't die." Ugh.  I hate this.  Freaking hate it. And with the trillion other things on my mind too, it is all just too much.  Why are they all getting older?  Why am I getting older?  Why is all this happening?